Amy Lewis on Fear, Self-Doubt & Happiness @AmyLewisAuthor #NonFiction #Memoir

How do you work through self-doubts and fear?

When I’m writing I am very intentional in creating a safe, creative zone to work from. I come from a theater background, and I remember learning early on that the stage was a place of safety and creative freedom where there was no room for self-doubt or judgment. I try to mimic that in my writing space. I do not think with a critic’s mind when I’m in that zone. It feels amazing and free – no editing allowed. This helps a great deal with keeping my fears from creeping into my work. When the work is ready to go out, well, then I must say I do have to contend with those fears. I have not found a way to get rid of self-doubt at that stage, but I think that’s part of being a creative artist.

What scares you the most?

What scares me most is not leading the life I was meant to live. I do believe we all have a purpose, certain gifts that we are meant to express in this life. The universe wants to see our own unique flower blossom, and while that sounds beautiful, I’m keenly aware of how hard it can be to allow yourself to bloom. Your flower might not look anything like what you thought it would, or what you wanted it to look like, or what your family or town or community wants it to look like. The courage to first discover and then be who you really are is no small thing.

What makes you happiest?

Stillness makes me happy. Slowing down makes me happy. Watching my daughter sleep and hearing her howl with laughter when I tickle her. Sitting under the stars with my best friend and feeling immense gratitude for his presence in my life. Dancing makes me insanely happy, Expressing emotions that have no words but come out in movement. Spending time with people that get me. Being around boldness and creative energy.

What’s your greatest character strength?

This one is not so easy and clear as my weakest trait. I’ve been told by many people that I have a great deal of courage – I’m ballsy. I’m an Aries so I have that strong, I’ll go first and I’m not afraid of anything energy. I can definitely see that trait in me, but I can also be very timid so it almost feels like a toggle switch that is either on or off. I also have a very strong awareness of my emotions and what I’m going through at any given moment (thanks to years of therapy, acting classes and a masters in spiritual psychology).

What’s your weakest character trait?
I have very little patience. In fact, I don’t even have the patience for this question. It’s been like this all my life. I blame it on the stars. Seriously. So many tasks, challenges, and goals I gave up on too soon because I didn’t see any early success. I would like to say I’m working on this but I’m not. I don’t know even know where to begin. Perhaps there’s a support group?

Why do you write?

I write for many reasons. Pure selfish self-expression is one reason. I write sometimes to discover where I am at psychologically speaking. I feel like I can move energy when I write and in doing so heal. I write stories to perform on stage. I write to tell people’s stories who might not have been heard. I write because it feels alive to be living in a story and not know where it will take me.

What motivates you to write?

Creativity equates to aliveness. It’s where anything is possible. And when I write, I feel alive. The irony is that my mind is necessary for me to write but I prefer to write as if I’m out of my mind. And by mind I mean my inner-critic, the judging, non-life affirming part of me.

Diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder, Amy struggled with depression and an addiction to sharp objects. Even hospitalization didn't help to heal her destructive tendencies. It took a tumultuous relationship with a man named Truth to bring her back from the depths of her own self-made hell.Amy's marriage to dark, intriguing Truth was both passionate and stormy. She was a fair-skinned southern girl from New Orleans. He was a charming black man with tribal tattoos, piercings, and a mysterious past. They made an unlikely pair, but something clicked. 

During their early marriage, they pulled themselves out of abject poverty into wealth and financial security practically overnight. Then things began to fall apart.Passionate and protective, Truth also proved violent and abusive. Amy’s own self-destructive tendencies created a powerful symmetry. His sudden death left Amy with an intense and warring set of emotions: grief for the loss of the man she loved, relief she was no longer a target for his aggression.

Conflicted and grieving, Amy found herself at a spiritual and emotional crossroads, only to receive help from an unlikely source: Truth himself. Feeling his otherworldly presence in her dreams, Amy seeks help from a famous medium.

Her spiritual encounters change Amy forever. Through Truth, she learns her soul is eternal and indestructible, a knowledge that gives Amy the courage to pursue her own dreams and transform herself both physically and emotionally. Her supernatural encounters help Amy resolve the internal anger and self-destructive tendencies standing between her and happiness, culminating in a sense of spiritual fulfillment she never dreamed possible.

An amazing true story, What Freedom Smells Like is told with courage, honesty, and a devilishly dark sense of humor.

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Genre – Memoir

Rating – PG-13

More details about the author

Connect with Amy Lewis through Twitter

Website www.WhatFreedomSmellsLike.com